Julie Tomlinson

What Does It Really Mean to Become?

manager — Thu, 03 Apr 2025 16:10:09 +0000

What Does It Really Mean to Become?

When I titled my debut novel 365 Days of Becoming, I knew the word “becoming” held a certain weight — a quiet power. It’s a word that suggests movement, growth, and transformation. But what I’ve come to realize is that becoming isn’t a single destination we arrive at, neatly tied with a bow. It’s not the moment we land the dream job, fall in love, or finally check the last item off our to-do list.

Becoming is something far more nuanced. It’s the unfolding of who we are, moment by moment.

Why Becoming Isn’t About Reaching a Destination

We live in a world that loves measuring progress. Promotions, accolades, new relationships — these markers often define what it means to be “successful.” But if we only focus on these outcomes, we risk missing the deeper, quieter transformations that happen along the way.

In 365 Days of Becoming, Reilly sets out on a journey of self-discovery. Like so many of us, she thinks she’s searching for clarity, healing, and a sense of certainty. But what she truly discovers is that life isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about becoming more of who she already is.

Her story is a reminder that we are constantly evolving — not just when things go according to plan, but also in moments of heartbreak, uncertainty, and stillness.

The Power of Embracing the In-Between Moments

It’s easy to feel like we’re stagnant when we don’t see visible progress. But what if the most profound growth happens in the spaces we can’t measure?

Becoming is waking up and facing the day, even when self-doubt lingers.

It’s choosing to sit with discomfort instead of running from it.

It’s allowing ourselves to be seen and heard, even when it feels vulnerable.

These in-between moments — the ones that rarely get celebrated — are often where we find our truest selves. And the beautiful thing? We don’t need to have all the answers to be “in progress.” The act of trying, of showing up, is a form of becoming.

Letting Go of the Need to Have It All Figured Out

We’re often taught to fear uncertainty. But what if not knowing is part of the magic? When we stop trying to control every twist and turn, we make space for growth we never could have planned.

Reilly’s year of becoming wasn’t without obstacles. She faced fears, confronted painful memories, and learned to navigate life on her own terms. But each challenge shaped her in ways she couldn’t have anticipated — not by leading her to a perfect ending, but by guiding her to a more authentic version of herself.

That’s the essence of becoming — allowing yourself to change without needing a final destination in sight.

Your Own Journey of Becoming

As I reflect on Reilly’s story and my own, I can’t help but wonder — how often do we dismiss our own growth simply because it doesn’t look the way we expected?

Maybe you’re navigating a career pivot. Maybe you’re healing from a heartbreak or discovering parts of yourself you never knew existed. Or maybe you’re simply in a season of stillness, unsure of what’s next.

Wherever you are, know this: You are still becoming.

Even when it feels like nothing is happening, life is shaping you. Every decision, every experience, and even every setback is a part of your unfolding story.

Becoming Is a Lifelong Act of Courage

The most beautiful realization I’ve had — and one that I hope 365 Days of Becoming conveys — is that we are never truly “done” becoming. There’s no finish line, no final version of ourselves we must strive for.

Instead, becoming is an invitation. It’s the courage to keep learning, to embrace the unknown, and to allow ourselves to grow in ways we never imagined.

So, the next time you find yourself questioning your progress or wondering if you’re “there” yet, ask yourself this: What if the journey itself is the greatest part of the story?

Final Thoughts on Embracing Your Journey of Becoming

If Reilly’s story resonates with you, I hope it serves as a reminder that your own journey is just as valuable — no matter how uncertain or imperfect it may feel.

And if you’re curious to explore her full journey, I invite you to read 365 Days of Becoming. Through her experiences, you might just find reflections of your own

Because we are all becoming, every single day.

Written by Julie Tomlinson

The post What Does It Really Mean to Become? appeared first on Julie Tomlinson.

Becoming, Day by Day — The Sequel

manager — Fri, 28 Mar 2025 19:37:27 +0000

First Look: Becoming, Day by Day — The Sequel

To 365 Days of Becoming

Discover What’s Next for Reilly in the Highly Anticipated Follow-Up to 365 Days of Becoming

If you were captivated by Reilly’s emotional journey in 365 Days of Becoming, prepare yourself—her story continues. The first book left readers on a subtle but powerful cliffhanger. (Don’t worry, no spoilers here!) But one thing is certain: Reilly has found love. The real question? Is it with herself or someone unexpected?

By the end of her year-long exploration of healing, self-discovery, and breaking free from people-pleasing, Reilly realized that her path of becoming was just beginning. And now, in Becoming, Day by Day, we catch up with her two years later. Life has changed. Love looks different. And Reilly is learning how to live her truth one mindful moment at a time.

Reilly’s Evolution: Who She Is Now, Two Years Later

Becoming, Day by Day, Reilly returns as a woman who’s wiser, more grounded, and spiritually in tune—yet still a beautiful work in progress. The journey of becoming never truly ends; it only evolves.

From Shy to Self-Assured: Reilly has stepped into her confidence, no longer shrinking herself to fit others’ expectations.

From People-Pleaser to Boundary-Setter: She has learned the power of saying “no” and the importance of honoring her own needs.

From Seeking Approval to Self-Acceptance: Reilly now defines herself not by how others see her, but by the truths she has come to know about herself.

But even with this newfound strength, challenges remain. Becoming, Day by Day invites readers to witness how Reilly applies the lessons she’s learned as she navigates love, loss, and the everyday messiness of life.

Familiar Faces Return—And New Characters Emerge

In this sequel, readers will delight in the return of beloved characters, each bringing their own stories of growth and discovery. Expect heartwarming reunions, unexpected twists, and the introduction of new faces that will both challenge and uplift Reilly along her path. Some relationships will shift, while others will test Reilly’s commitment to the woman she’s become. And when it comes to love? Well, let’s just say the heart has a way of surprising us all.

Why Becoming, Day by Day Will Speak to Your Soul

Much like 365 Days of Becoming, this sequel offers another deeply introspective dive into what it means to embrace life’s uncertainties. But this time, the question shifts to one we all inevitably face: What comes after the breakthrough?

Through themes of mindful living, oneness consciousness, and the many facets of love, Reilly’s story invites readers to act on their insights, nurture their inner growth, and move forward with greater clarity and self-love. Whether you’re still searching for your way or standing firmly in your truth, Reilly’s evolution serves as a heartfelt reminder that becoming isn’t a destination—it’s a continuous unfolding, full of lessons, beauty, and meaning.

Mark Your Calendar: When to Expect Becoming, Day by Day

The wait won’t be long! Stay tuned for the official release date announcement. In the meantime, follow me on social media for exclusive sneak peeks, behind-the-scenes insights, and updates on all things Becoming, Day by Day. Ready to continue following Reilly? Trust the journey. It always knows the way.

Written by Julie Tomlinson

The post Becoming, Day by Day — The Sequel appeared first on Julie Tomlinson.

To Boycott or Not?

manager — Thu, 13 Mar 2025 14:54:55 +0000

To Boycott or Not?

The Indie Author’s Amazon Dilemma

The Amazon Boycott Debate: Where Do Indie Authors Stand?

The conversation around boycotting Amazon has gained momentum, with authors and readers questioning the ethics of supporting a platform that dominates the publishing industry. While I understand the frustrations that have led to this movement, I also recognize a reality that cannot be ignored: many indie authors depend on Amazon to make a living.

As a newly published author, I find myself at the crossroads of this debate. Like many others, I want to support fair treatment for authors, better industry practices, and more diverse publishing options. But I also know that completely abandoning Amazon could hurt independent authors far more than it pressures the company to change.

So, where does that leave us? Instead of taking an all-or-nothing stance, I believe the real discussion should be about balance, sustainability, and giving readers more choices.

Why the Boycott is a Dilemma for Indie Authors

Boycotting a company often carries a symbolic weight, a way for consumers to push back against unfair practices. However, in the case of Amazon and indie publishing, the situation is more complicated.

For independent authors, Amazon is more than just a bookseller. It’s a lifeline in a competitive and often unpredictable industry. Here’s why:

Discoverability Matters – Amazon is the leading marketplace where new authors are discovered. It offers recommendation algorithms, Kindle Unlimited, and a massive global audience that smaller platforms simply can’t match.

A Primary Revenue Stream – Many self-published authors earn the majority of their income through Amazon sales. A sudden shift away from the platform could put their livelihoods at risk.

Readers Are Already There – While there are great alternative booksellers, Amazon remains the go-to platform for millions of readers. Asking readers to completely change their habits is a challenge, especially when convenience plays a major role in book-buying decisions.

That’s why the question isn’t just “Should we boycott Amazon?” but rather, “How can we support indie authors while also encouraging better practices in publishing?”

A More Balanced Approach: Expanding, Not Eliminating, Options

Instead of a full-scale boycott, we should be talking about practical ways to diversify the way indie books are sold and supported.

Encourage Alternative Purchasing Options – Instead of removing books from Amazon, authors can offer additional ways to purchase—through independent bookstores, direct author sales, and platforms like Bookshop.org or Kobo.

Advocate for Fairer Policies – Rather than cutting Amazon off completely, we can push for changes that benefit authors, such as better royalty structures, improved discoverability for diverse voices, and greater transparency in advertising algorithms.

Empower Readers with Choice – Rather than asking readers to stop using Amazon altogether, why not educate them on other ways to support their favorite authors? This could mean buying directly from an author’s website, requesting books at local bookstores, or leaving reviews to boost indie authors’ visibility.

The goal should be sustainability for indie authors—not a reactionary move that could unintentionally hurt the very people who are already struggling to make a name for themselves.

Opening the Conversation, Not Closing Doors

At the end of the day, this isn’t just about Amazon—it’s about the future of independent publishing and how we, as authors and readers, navigate an industry where control is often in the hands of a few major players.

I don’t have all the answers, but I believe this discussion is worth having. Instead of choosing sides in a black-and-white debate, I encourage all of us—authors, readers, and industry professionals—to explore solutions that allow indie authors to thrive without cutting off one of their biggest platforms.

What do you think? I’d love to hear from fellow writers and readers on this topic. Let’s start a conversation about what’s next for indie publishing.

Written by Julie Tomlinson

The post To Boycott or Not? appeared first on Julie Tomlinson.

Taking a Break from Dating:

manager — Tue, 11 Mar 2025 15:18:39 +0000

Taking a Break from Dating:

Why a Year-Long Hiatus Led to Self-Discovery and My Debut Novel

Hitting Rock Bottom: When Life Felt Like It Was Falling Apart

By the end of 2023, my mental health was a one out of 10. Out of the closet for two years—feeling so liberated—yet I still felt deeply disconnected from my truest self. Pushing 220 pounds, I was at my highest weight ever—the former athlete and long-distance runner in me waving goodbye from afar. My contract proofreading job was coming to an end, and living paycheck to paycheck at 38 felt humiliating—especially since I had been a successful advertising executive for most of my career.

And, much to my chagrin, each night, I found comfort in an oversized bottle of wine—numbing my emotions of sadness and despair just to make it to the next day.

Yet, despite all this, I was still swiping left and right on those damn dating apps.

The Harsh Truth: I Didn’t Love Myself

But it was all superficial bullshit. I knew the truth—I didn’t love myself. And deep down, I understood that if I didn’t love myself, how could I possibly love someone else?

That realization hit me like a freight train. No relationship, no casual fling, no romantic distraction was going to fix the emptiness I felt inside. I had spent years searching for validation through others, but it was never enough. Something had to change.

The Year-Long Dating Detox: Choosing Myself Over Love

That was my wake-up call. Call me crazy, but I chose to take a self-imposed, year-long break from dating—not to mend a broken heart or move on from someone else, but to reconnect with myself. I had drifted further and further from my authentic self, and I knew I needed a reset.

So, I did something radical: I committed to a dating detox and poured my energy into the one thing that had always been mine—writing. What started as a personal experiment in self-discovery became the spark that reignited my greatest dream: becoming an author and telling stories about introspection and transformation.

The Accidental Birth of a Fictional Memoir

On a random, frigid evening in February 2024, I sat down at my laptop—PJs on, a glass of wine in hand—and started typing, nothing too purposeful. The rhythmic clicks of the keyboard soothed me like a familiar melody. I had no direction, no plot structure, no character profiles—just an urge to write.

The first scene I wrote? The sex scene between Reilly and Alexis. More specifically, the emotional aftermath—Reilly laying there, hollow and used, realizing she’s nothing more than an object in her situationship with Alexis.

Looking back, I can see the irony. That passage wasn’t just about Reilly—it was about me. Her emotions, her struggles, and her search for meaning mirrored exactly what I had felt in the wake of my last relationship.

As the words continued to pour out over the following days and weeks, I had a realization: Reilly’s journey was unfolding just like my own. Her personality, her past experiences, even her choices in the present—all of it felt intimately familiar. And then it hit me. I’m Reilly, and Reilly is me.

At the time, I had no idea what a “fictional memoir” was. I wasn’t even sure what I was writing. Was this just a personal journal, a way to process my own heartbreak, make sense of my life, and map out my future? Or was Reilly’s story something more—a narrative that could resonate with others, that could inspire?

I chose to believe in the latter. So I kept going, trusting that I had something worth sharing with the world. The book wouldn’t get its title for months, but 365 Days of Becoming had already begun.

Breaking Free from Dating: How Taking a Hiatus Transformed My Life

Like Reilly, I embraced singlehood with a sense of purpose and possibility. Stepping away from the cycle of mindless swiping and fleeting validation was a relief—it freed up mental and emotional space for what truly mattered. Instead of chasing external affirmation, I focused inward, and here’s what I accomplished:

Of course, not every moment was a triumph. There was a particularly dark period—one so pivotal that I’m considering weaving it into the sequel (coming late 2025). But in the grand scheme, choosing to focus on myself, after years of prioritizing others, was the most important decision I could have made.

The truth is, it’s never too late to embark on your own journey of self-reflection and discovery. And if there’s one thing I hope my readers take away, it’s this: The most profound transformations happen when we finally choose ourselves.

Tips for an Informal, Intuitive Approach to Personal Transformation

If you’re feeling the pull to embark on your own transformational journey, know this—it doesn’t have to start with a formal roadmap, a therapy appointment, or a perfectly outlined plan. Like Reilly, and even myself, you can take the fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants approach and still experience profound growth.

Try taking a solo trip to clear your mind and reconnect with yourself. Revisit old emotional wounds, not to dwell, but to understand how they’ve shaped you—and how they no longer have to define you. Reflect on the patterns in your life, the choices you’ve made, and the ways your past still echoes in your present. Pay attention to those aha moments when life teaches you something in real-time. Dive into books that challenge your perspective. Try something new—whether it’s a hobby, a morning ritual, or simply the way you talk to yourself.

Most importantly, trust that self-discovery doesn’t have a deadline. It unfolds in the quiet moments, the unexpected realizations, and the small but powerful choices you make every day. You don’t need all the answers right now—you just need the willingness to look inward and the courage to embrace whatever you find. Because when you do, you’ll realize that becoming isn’t about finding a new version of yourself. It’s about uncovering the one who’s been there all along. And the best part? The journey of becoming never truly ends—there’s always more to learn, more to explore, and more of yourself to discover.

Written by Julie Tomlinson

The post Taking a Break from Dating: appeared first on Julie Tomlinson.